What causes a book cover to be banned?
I swear, from the looks of things, you'd think that I'm a sweet girl. Non-offensive, from the start of my buttoned cardigan to the Mary-Jane's on my feet. But, apparently, I'm still ban-worthy. I've done this post before. Five months ago. When Sex Love Repeat got smitted down by the Amazon gods and hidden in the corner of their site they typically reserve for incest and beastiality. Yep, Brother Fuckers, I love Bigfoot, and little 'ol me.
I'm back in the corner. Just the Sex - my collection of sex scenes pulled from three bestselling erotica books - BANNED from general search criteria. BANNED from recommendations or 'Customers Who Bought This Also Bought' references. *cue my big dramatic sigh*
I really thought, with this one, I was behaving. The rules of Amazon covers: -no nipples: check -no butt crack: check -no penis or vaginas: check -no covering of above body parts with other body parts, such as hands: check -no overt suggestion of nudity: check
Thought I was covered. Panties on the cover. A finger slid underneath, but not too far. Way away from any exciting areas.
Eighteen hours. That's as long as this book made it before Amazon swooped down from almighty and smacked it into the corner.
I was PISSED. FURIOUS. My family ate cold food for a week while I ranted and raved. Then I had lunch with CD Reiss. Midway through my furious rant on all things unfair, she pulled out her phone. Looked up my cover. And about fell out of her chair. "Uh... no. You're wrong." she said bluntly. "That is DEFINITELY banworthy." Well...shit.
I've done the stubborn thing for two weeks. Crossed my arms, stuck out my bottom lip and said 'fuck you - I'm not changing it'. Then... I had to pay the water bill. And dog kibble. And I really really want some new stilettos...
This is a business. I can't sell what people can't find. So *dramatic sigh* I am going to change the cover. In one week. That will allow all of you who are passionate about this cover to snap up this ebook. I am also going to pub, in 2 days, a paperback with this cover on it. That will stay on Amazon for a while.
xoxo - hope you all have a kickass weekend.
big hugs,
the rejected one